Bits & Pieces Index

The Job Description

I trod, where fools alone may tread,

who speak what’s better left unsaid,

the day I asked the boss his view

on what I was supposed to do.

For, after two years in the task,

I thought it only right to ask,

in case I’d got it badly wrong

ad-hoc'ing as I went along.

He slowly raised his eyes

and made no effort to disguise

that, what had cased my sudden whim,

had equally occurred to him,

and thus did we embark upon

our classic corporate exercise,

to separate the fact from fiction,

trying to define my job description.

For first he asked me to construe

a list of things I really do,

while he, he promised, would prepare

a note of what he thought they were.

And. With the two, we’d take as well

an expert view from personnel,

and thus eliminate any doubt

on what my job was all about.

But when the boss and I, our lists collated

of the all tasks that were separately stated,

the evidence soon became abundant

one of must be redundant.

For what I stated I was doing

He claimed, himself, to be pursuing.

While my role, by his definition,

was way outside my recognition.

He called in personnel to give

a somewhat more definitive reply,

but they, by way of answer,

produced some vague extravaganza.

Depicting, in a web of charts,

descriptive and prescriptive parts

of tasks, the boss and I agree,

can’t possibly refer to me.

So, hanging limply as I am,

in limbo on the diagram,

suspended by a dotted line

from functions that I thought were mine,

I feel it’s maybe for the best

I make my innocent request;

and hopefully await their view

on which job of the three I do!

(Bertie Ramsbottom) and modified by me