Relationship Notes 

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Understand the Nature of the Relationship

So often I hear people complain about their relationships and the complaint is always that the other person or people are not giving them what they want or feel that they should be getting. They have expectations and these are not being met so they get annoyed.

Just go back and think about your original intent when you initiated or agreed to this relationship.

In virtually every relationship you will find, if you are honest, that you entered the relationship to get something that you felt was to your benefit.

You got married for your benefit not your spouse's.

You had children for your benefit not theirs.

You took the job for your benefit, not your employer's.

You have to take responsibility for your response to the situations in a relationship. All too often however our response to a situation is based on what we think the other person is up to.

Use these questions to clarify the relationship so that you can respond responsibly.

What is the nature of the relationship? (parent/child - employer/employee - friend - spouse/partner etc.)

Who is involved in the relationship? (list all the people involved)

What is the benefit to you in this relationship? (Why did you start it in the first place and why are you still in it?)

What do you expect from the others in the relationship?

Do they know that you expect this?

How do they feel about it?

What is the cost/benefit to them of this relationship and meeting your expectations?

Do they know this?

How do they feel about it?

What are your responsibilities in this relationship?

Have you fulfilled them?

Your relationships will always go sour when you expect the existing situation to be different. The existing situation cannot be different but when you take responsibility for your relationships you can work towards getting the future situation to be the way that you want it to be.

To live your best life be true to the YOU, that you want to be.

Live with passion. Change your life from making a living to making a difference.

Live up to the reputation that you want to have.